Being a bridesmaid can bring out the jealousy, the cattiness, or the pushover in any girl. If your bestie chooses you to help her plan her dream wedding, keep these tips in mind before you become a bridesmaid-zilla or a total doormat.
1. The Bride is (Almost) Always Right
Yes, it is her special day and yes, she should be the center of attention but you know her really well so hopefully you’ll be able to identify if she’s making a horrible mistake. If you know she has always dreamed of a classic white gown she’s about to choose a “nontraditional” red wedding dress under the influence of a pushy bridal consultant, step in a make sure she knows what she’s doing. Weddings can be stressful and sometimes anxiety and pressure from others can present a bride with undue pressure causing her to act irrationally. You should listen to the bride and respect her wishes but if she’s about to commit a total wedding faux-pas, step in and help her put a stop to it.
2. Just Wear the Ugly Dress!
We all know that bridesmaids’ dresses can be ugly, even hideous. You can share your opinion on the color or the style but if the bride is set on a certain style, just go with it. No offense, but no one is supposed to be looking at you when your bride is standing at the altar anyway so suck it up and wear the dress. Maybe your funky dress will act as a conversation starter between you and a cute groomsman? Maybe you can make some chic throw pillows from the dress material after the wedding? But, if nothing good comes of your hideous frock, at least you’ll have some hilarious pictures to laugh at with your BFF years later.
3. Be Her Bodyguard
Controlling older sister? Aggressive mother-in-law? Rude dress saleswoman? Have your bride’s back. If someone is trying to push her around, stand up for her. If her mother tells her she looks fat in her dream dress when she really looks great, speak up and tell her. If her older sister is being a bridesmaid bitch and demanding a trip to Las Vegas when all your bride wants is a fancy dinner out with her girlfriends, take the bride’s side. She’ll appreciate you fighting for her. The bride feels like she has to please everybody so her knowing that at least one person (you!) is on her side, will make her feel way more confident in her decisions.
4. Personalize It!
Anyone can be a bridesmaid but only you can be your bride’s bridesmaid. You know her better than anyone! Leverage that knowledge to make everything you plan for her unique and special. Does she love chocolate fondue? Serve it at her bridal shower! Does she have an adventurous streak? Take her skydiving for her bachelorette party! Use what you know about her to maximize her bridal experience.
5. Her Wedding is NOT Your Wedding
At the end of the day, it’s her special day and not yours. She’ll do things you disagree with, even things you hate. But remember, you were her best friend before you were her bridesmaid and you’ll need to put her happiness before your own during her wedding.