The majority of us have standards when it comes to being in a relationship and at the top of most of our lists is “physical attraction.” Unless you are completely shallow, it’s not the most important element of a relationship but it does appear in your top ten requirements. So, you met a guy about six months ago. You are really taking things slow, he thinks that you want to get to know him better before you make anything official. You are not physically intimate at all because you don’t want to lead him on. Quite frankly, you’ve never met anyone quite like him; in short you have become best friends. He is loyal, loving, attentive and incredibly romantic; you have never been treated like this by any guy in your entire dating career. He sounds perfect right? Well, there’s one problem……………. You are not physically attracted to him. It’s not that he’s ugly, there’s simply no chemistry there.
You’ve been in several relationships and found that when the chemistry is high, it always ends in a massive downer so you are seriously considering compromising on the chemistry, as long as the guy has everything else, it shouldn’t be a problem. However, now that you’ve met this amazing guy but there’s no chemistry your fear is that if you feel this way now, how are you going to feel in ten years time? This is a tricky dilemma that many women and men have to battle with. Here is some great advice to help you to make your decision.
One of the worst mistakes you can make when getting into a relationship is to compromise on your standards. Human beings can be so co-dependant that they will settle for anything as long as they are not alone. What this leads to is a life of misery and regret. You have to be honest with yourself and decide what is important to you. There are some women who are not concerned with physical attraction and they would rather have the emotional security. If you are one of those women, then getting into a relationship where you are not attracted to your partner is fine. However, if you are one of the women who feel as if you have to compromise on what you want just for the sake of being in a relationship, you are definitly making a mistake that will end in disaster.
Attraction cannot and will not grow if you are not initially attracted to a man. According to scientific research it takes seven seconds for a woman to decide if she is sexually attracted to a man or not. After that, it’s game over! If sexual attraction is important to you and you end up in a relationship with a man you are not attracted to expect to experience the following:
- Complete disgust when he tries to get intimate with you.
- Spend most of your days trying to figure out how to avoid sex with your partner.
- An unfulfilled sex life.
- Damaging his self esteem.
- Getting a play mate on the side which can get really ugly really quickly if you get caught.
What you need to do is work out why you are even thinking about compromising in this area. The fact that you are even asking the question is a clear indication that being sexually attracted to your partner is important to you. So why are you contemplating ditching this as a criteria for your relationship requirements? Do you feel as if you are getting older and the clock is ticking so you are in a rush to settle down? Are all of your friends getting married and you feel as if you are the odd one out? Do you feel as if it’s not possible to find a combination of both chemistry and emotional stability? It is essential that you work out why you are willing to compromise because in the long run it will cause you more harm than good.
Waiting for Mr Right can be a tiring process of trial and error. Some women stick it out and only choose to settle down when they can tick everything on their list of wants in a man. Other women make the decision to compromise and end up having to face the consequences later on in life. It is important to understand that choosing a partner is critical and many women do so based on selfish criteria such as they don’t want to be alone. The reality of the situation is that this man is going to be the father of your children and it is essential that your children are raised in a loving environment with good role models. Therefore, choose wisely when you are looking for a partner.