One of the questions that stands out from others is a question asked by a woman who wants to know how long to wait for her boyfriend to propose. The woman in question has been dating her boyfriend for over two months now. The boyfriend is a great partner with a good job but has not popped the question. The question now is, how long should a lady wait for a proposal before she can move on?
Right now, there is no current research on how long a courtship should last. Years ago, the statistic is that most courtships lasted for six months to fourteen months before the man pops the big question or the partners went their ways.
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I am currently handling a study on marriage and family development with a colleague. With ran research which began in 2008 and is still ongoing. Several hundreds of couples were asked how long after they started dating did their partner pop the question. On the average, most couples agreed that is 2.8 years after the relationship took a romantic turn. To determine whether to stay or move on you need to ask yourself these questions;
1. Can You Accept The Relationship As It Is?
A lot of women only want to get married because it is what the society wants. The truth is that you don’t need to get married or have children to be happy indeed.
There are a lot of unmarried couples who prefer to together that are cohabiting instead of going on with the traditional convention of getting married. Thus, you need to ask yourself if you are ready to flow with the relationship in its current state.
A relationship is a two-way thing. You need to ask yourself what you want from it and compare it with what’s on the ground currently. If you are n not satisfied with what is on the ground, then you need to move on with your life.
2. Are You Willing To Take A Stand For What You Want?
After you have answered the first question, you need to decide whether you are ready to take a stand for what you want. This does not mean you should create ultimatums for your partner. That is a sure way to kill the romance.
You can have a heart-to-heart discussion with your spouse to know what is holding him back from taking the relationship to the next level. Also, if you are having issues in the relationship, this is also an avenue to bring up the issues and trash them out.
Nobody will hold you down in a relationship where you are not willing to accept it’s current state. You will be doing your partner a big favor by calling it quit. This is because if you are uncomfortable with the relationship, you will exhibit signs that will always push your partner to the edge.
3. Address the Issues
After your partner outlines the issues holding him back to committing fully to the relationship, you need to decide if the issues are worth address or rejecting. For instance, the issue may be that either of you is still in college or even having financial issues.
These kinds of issues are worth discussing. But if his reason is that he is afraid to commit, it may not be worth accepting. If your partner is willing to talk about your relationship and the issues you are facing in it, then there are chances you can salvage the relationship and work towards improvement.
But if your partner is negligent of the troubles you are facing, then you should be wary of sticking in the relationship and wasting your time.
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4. Can you wait it out?
After addressing the issue, you need to decide if you can wait to sort the issue or take a walk. For instance, if the problem has to do with money, can you wait till he starts making enough income? This decision is very critical as your emotions may cloud your better judgment.
You have to be objective here, take reality as it is and make the right choice. If your boyfriend committed to keeping you together, then you can go for it.
