Sure, Sir Mix-A-Lot likes big butts, but he definitely doesn’t understand the everyday struggles that come from having junk in the trunk. Only other women with big butts can understand the daily obstacles like shopping for jeans, sitting on a seat (comfortably), and wearing something comfortable that does bare all.
Finding a pair of jeans that fit your legs, hip, and waist
Unless you get a personal denim tailor like Kim K, finding a pair of jeans that can make it over your butt, without being too baggy around your lags and without having the dreaded waist gap is nearly impossible.
Ripping your pants right in the butt
You finally found the impossible, a pair of jeans that actually fit! Too bad you dropped your phone and ripped them when you picked it up.
The missing Belt Loop
We’ve all done it. Grabbed onto our belt loops to help us while we shimmy ourselves into a pair of pants. But nothing sucks more than the moment when that belt loop rips off.
All of your shorts are booty shorts
It’s not your fault, you’re not doing it on purpose. The fashion industry just isn’t ready to serve someone with your specific assets. No matter how hard you try and how many times you tug your shorts down, your bottom cheeks just always seem to make their way out into the world.
And if your butt isn’t hanging out of your shorts, your crack probably is
Let’s face it. If your under-butt isn’t out you’re probably sporting a plumbers crack without even knowing it. Plumber’s crack can be cute, right?
Leggings almost never work
You just want to be comfortable like everyone else, but with a butt as big as yours, leggings just stretch near your rump and become see through. Will there ever be a day when I well-rounded booty can enjoy the comfort that only a pair of leggings can provide in public without passerby’s making comments under their breath?
Dresses and skirts becoming mini-dresses and mini-skirts
What fits everyone else just above the knee hits just after your bodacious booty when you put it on. There’s just no more fabric left once you get it over your cheeks.
Bathing suit bottoms may as well be thongs
Sure it says “cheeky” but you know those itsy bitsy bottom is going to be eaten alive by your two cakes. When everyone else at the beach is running around with a cute amount of butt out, you’re getting dirty looks from moms at the beach. Sorry! We’re not trying to flaunt our assets at the beach, we’re just trying to have a good time too.
Having Legit Back Problems
Nobody ever talks about the toll having a bodacious booty can have on your physical health. Big butts cause lower back pain and nobody likes lower back pain.
People Automatically Assume you can twerk
Having a huge butt doesn’t mean we know how to dance…. But it certainly helps.
Anytime a Song Mentions Big Butts Your Friends Look at You
Yes, we know this song is about big butts. Yes, I know I have a big butt.
Your Boyfriend Cuddles with your Butt more than he cuddles with you
When you really just want to lay on your boyfriend’s chest but he’s already fallen asleep on your butt. Don’t take it as an insult, ladies, when he falls asleep on your butt it’s because it’s better than any pillow out there.
Having a big butt comes with its own set of issues that only other women with big butts can understand. Despite all the struggles, embarrassing moments and ripped jeans, you know that you look good and you wouldn’t trade it for anything else.
