Congratulations if you have been selected to be a maid of honor. It’s really a great honor to be one and of course, it comes with all the fun and excitement, even till the big day. Nonetheless, being a maid of honor comes with huge responsibilities, so that if you aren’t cut out for it, you can just mess it all up for the bride. That can be devastating and humiliating.
Talking about responsibilities, there are a lot of things that would be in your care as a maid of honor. Planning the bachelorette party, ordering the bridesmaid dresses and making sure it arrives on time, leading the bridal party, hosting the bridal shower, reserving hotel and travel bookings, and even giving speech are among the many duties a maid of honor does. Hectic right? That is why it’s cumbersome and even more for anyone that hasn’t done it before.
So what happens if you are not cut out for it? Do you think you still don’t have the qualities to become a maid of honor? Well, don’t fret. It’s your first time. It’s perfectly normal to fret about something that you haven’t done before. But here it is, if you know you aren’t cut out for it, these are what you should do.
Plan the budget
The bride should have probably given you the list of items that is needed like bridesmaid dresses, flowers, etc, but is yet to factor the budget. It’s your responsibilities to come up with some design templates for the bridesmaid dresses, check for flowers, and calculate the costs. If it’s more expensive than you initially thought or above the budget, communicate with the bride to come up with alternatives. There is a possibility that you might fund a lot of the items on list and you may not afford them all. That is why it’s important to communicate with bride.
Stay close to the mom
Well, there is something interesting about moms. They hate to stand in a corner, observing. They are ever ready to lend a hand to get something done, even if it means condemning your efforts, just so that you ask for their help. She wants to be more involved in getting those flowers arranged, getting the bridal shower planned and all that.
For the fact that she did her wedding decades ago doesn’t mean she can’t bring something to the table in modern times with her wealth of experience. She must have attended other weddings and seen how it’s done as well. You might call them old-school, but asking for their help will surely help speed things up. So if you aren’t cut out for it, make the bride’s mom your best friend and you can never imagine what her input will mean for the whole wedding preparation.
Always check in the bride
The bride will surely be busy with her own set of duties but checking-in on her often will reduce the chances of you making some mistakes. The bride will surely understand that this is your first time, so she would make sure that she’s there to help out with anything that you request from her.
A simple text a couple of times a week will do. While texting, make sure you update the bride on what you have done so far. She may add her own input on what needs to be done and what needn’t to be done. Also, ask her if she needs something to be done. She may have a couple of tasks that she wants you to handle for her. That’s one of the reasons why you are her maid of honor anyways.
Delegate responsibilities
Because of you are the maid of honor, you feel you have the responsibility of putting all the arrangements together on your own. No, it doesn’t work like that. It’s suicidal.
One of the ways you can use to lessen your maid of honor responsibilities is by delegating some part of the wedding planning. Leave the core wedding planning to yourself and delegate the rest. The bride will always ask you to do a lot of maid of honor things and it can be really hectic. Have someone take care of the flowers (the bride’s mom can do this). Have another put together some design templates for wedding dresses. You can also delegate the wedding colors. What you need to do is to supervise them and make sure what you requested for is what you got. This way, you can focus more on other deliverables.
Don’t plan the bachelorette party yourself
More or like of delegation. If you plan on planning the whole bachelorette party yourself, you might miss one or two important things out of it. Not to talk of things can get messy if it gets out of your hand. To avoid the drama, ask for input from your friends and colleagues. They will be glad to help you the best possible way they can. Consult them for feedbacks on how you are planning it. Since they are your friends, they will definitely tell you the truth about the whole process.
Be aware of relatives and outsiders
Just because you asked for help from the bride’s mom, other relatives might want to leverage to stroll in and get involved in the wedding process. You might be even be bossed through the process, but it’s left for you to remain resilient. Be careful and watch out for them. The bride trusts you to distance them from making the major decisions, so don’t let her down.
Consult other experienced maid of honors
You might know one or two women that have being maid of honors before. It won’t take anything from you by asking them for help. Keep them abreast of the whole process, so that they can voice their input. Some women just love being maid of honors and they would be extremely happy to help out with your wedding planning.
Keep mothers and relatives out of the bachelorette
The bridal shower? Yes, they can come, but the bachelorette? No, they are not welcome, so don’t invite them to the bachelorette. The bachelorette is for the bride, her friends, the maid of honor and other bridesmaids. The old women wouldn’t stand the fun and nasty things that happen in the bachelorette, so keep them out of it.
There is still hope for those maid of honors who aren’t cut out for the whole wedding thing. All it takes is careful planning and communication, so as to not miss anything. I believe you will do just fine as a maid of honor if you do these things listed here.
RELATED STORES:
