Times today are nowhere as “traditional” as they once were. Grandmothers are much younger, many families are blended, sometimes there are two moms, two dads, grandparents are parents, parents are single and the list can go on and on. What about those who are trying to keep to a more traditional family plan though, is a post pregnancy proposal extreme, mainstream or in poor taste?
Just breathe, there is no reason to head off to the convent just yet. Plenty of women are getting pregnant before the engagement nowadays. This is because premarital sex has been far more socially accepted. Not everyone hinged their hopes on the plan B alternative.
What it comes down to is if the proposal comes out of love, and it was going to happen anyways it is not in poor taste. However, if the proposal comes out of obligation to you being pregnancy, though chivalrous, it is not a good idea to accept. While it is not poor taste, you have to have more than a child in common to make a marriage work.
A lot of things have to come together for a marriage to work. Love, trust, commitment and compatibility as well as responsibility are only a few of these things that are required. If your partner is committed to you and your child that is great, ring or no ring. The unfortunate thing is that some people co-parent much better without it, and before you get married it is best to know what category you fall in. After all, parents with a healthy relationship are far better than those that have an unhealthy relationship.
It is very important that you do nothing out of concern for what other people think. One very smart lady said that if we would spend more time praying for rather than talking about people we would get a lot farther. Don’t worry about what other people think more than your well being or the well being of your child. Rushing can actually ruin what would have been a very good future. So, while it is not in poor taste to propose post pregnancy do it when you are ready and for the right reasons. The answer as to what is right or wrong will be different for every couple, and it all comes down to knowing your relationship as well as the person that you share it with.
A baby wont fix things and neither will marriage. Either it works or it done. The worst thing you can do is marry because of a pregnancy, and if you are not positive that your mate is proposing for much deeper reasons waiting is always a good idea. See how things go.
Have you ever seen your partner with children? Have you ever lived with him or spent a lot of time alone? How are your communication skills? How well do you do together during silent times or when there is nothing much to do? Do you mesh well as respect one anther’s individuality? Do you trust him with your life, unconditionally? Do either one of you still feel like there is a lot of “living to do.” Will a proposal interfere with big dreams, and if so d you think there will be resentment down the line? There are a lot of things to consider. Though “traditional” values have changed considerably “marriage for life” is still a commitment that is meant to be forever. A lot of children suffer and are in fact the ones who suffer the most when parents divorce or have unhealthy relationships.
