Fellas, we love you. We love the way you’re so strong. We love it when you romance us. We love the way that you give us butterflies in our stomachs, and we adore the way you look. No, really–we do!
Though us girls adore guys, there are still things we wish they’d stop doing. We’re not just talking about the pervy stuff, either. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of common courtesy or respect. This is especially true when it’s the first time they take us home.
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We don’t ask for much, really. But guys, please, stop doing these things when you finally get us into your apartments…
Acting like you’ve already “conquered us.”
You know exactly what we’re talking about! We know you do. It’s that weird, self-congratulatory strut some guys do when they decided they’re about to get laid and that they have it all in the bag. Some guys even brag to their dates about other sexual encounters when they do this.
This behavior goes beyond the annoying, and goes straight into WTF mode. Do guys really think this is attractive, or do they just not care what other girls think of them?
Going from 0 to 60 too fast.
While we’re at it, can we talk about the way guys like to go straight to the bedroom once a girl comes home with them? We get it. You’re horny. We might be horny too. That’s why we’re here, right?
Well, there’s something to be said about the thrill of the chase, people. Sit down with us. Offer us some wine, talk to us. Rushing things takes away from the magic of seduction and can be a major turnoff for certain girls. Come on, now. Relax. Enjoy your time with us.
Asking us to cook you something.
No, this is not as uncommon as you think it is. Yes, it’s absolutely rude. You invited US over. Treat us like a guest, not like a maid!
Trying to reassure us that you might not sleep with us.
Almost every girl has heard a guy say, “Don’t think that you visiting will mean that I’ll sleep with you.” Please stop it. If you’re not down to bang, that’s totally cool but doesn’t need to be announced by you that way. Just don’t try to bang us. It’s that simple!
When we hear this, it’s pretty clear to us that you’re trying to play it smooth and it just comes off as fake. It makes us feel guilty if we do want to sleep with you, and just doesn’t come across as a nice thing to say at all.
Give us a tour that ends at the bedroom.
Surprise, surprise, right? Wonder why the tour always ends at the bedroom. It’s not subtle. It’s hackneyed. If we need to know where something is, we can ask. If you want to give a tour, show us the bedroom and end the tour at the living room so it doesn’t come off as pushy.
Giving that wink or smirk to your roommate.
If you live with roommates, this is a great way to make sure that we see that as a turn-off. Your roommate isn’t stupid. He or she knows when you are about to get laid, and if they’re polite, they’ll make it casual and give us space.
Winking or smirking at your roommate isn’t cool. It’s bragging over a fling. It makes us feel cheap. Knock it off.
Asking us to watch a Netflix movie.
Yes, Netflix and chill is a thing. Yes, we know you don’t give a shit about the movie. No, you don’t have to pull this in order to get us to fool around. Unless you’re in high school, this is cheesy as can be.
Pouring drinks down our throats, insisting that we can “sleep there” if we need to.
I know that I said we want to be offered a drink. This is still true. One to two drinks is fine with most of us–though some girls won’t even want to get a second. Trying to insist we drink with you, on the other hand, is not cool.
The worst thing a guy can do when he has a girl over is to keep pushing booze at her, even when she says no. It crosses boundaries, gets girls uneasy, and is ridiculously predatory. Some might even call it rapey. Don’t do it.
Rapidly cleaning.
Most men are not going to be too tidy, and most girls are aware of that. We still want to see a reasonably clean home, but there’s no reason to go into a full panic if you have a pile of clothes on the floor.
When guys do the wild “pitch stuff in the laundry basket” move, we know you’re desperate to get laid. Chill out. You’re ruining the vibes! Relax and just let it be.
Going on your laptop or playing video games.
Yes, this is a thing. No, we are not cool with it. If you invite us over, it’s because you wanted to hang out with us and enjoy our company. Popping open your laptop to read some news on Reddit is not our idea of a fun time, nor is the idea of watching you play Overwatch.
If you want laptop time, don’t invite us over. Do it on your own time. We’ll understand.
Getting wasted.
Girls are often told that there aren’t many things as unattractive as a drunk woman. Sadly, we don’t think guys got the same memo when they’re young. Since you didn’t get the memo, let me spell it out for you: getting drunk when you have a girl over is not cute. It’s gross. And alarming.
No one wants to have to play babysitter to a puking, piss-drunk date. It puts an undue burden on your date. Getting that wasted is a great way to show us that you are not the type of person who can behave themselves. If you choose to ignore this warning, don’t be surprised if we don’t call you back.
