Lets face it, many of today’s traditions aren’t very traditional. Even the sacred dowry traditions are undergoing more modernized tweaks. A lot of the traditions are outdated, and if you know the meaning behind them, they are downright insulting. This doesn’t even touch on the unfair burdian to family.
Deviations from these long lived and followed traditions is causing some upset with the more traditional sets because the institutions of marriage is sacred and cloaked in traditions that many families have passed down for generations.
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Some families are headstrong and insistent about keeping their cherished traditions in place, while others are secretly worried how they will live up to the obligation. Only you know your family and what they can or can not afford. If you have a traditional family but you know their finances are tight then you may have to be the one to dig your heels in and say no, MOm, no Dad, I’ve got this.
[tweetthis twitter_handles=”@SweetieBomb”]If you have a traditional family but you know their finances are tight then you may have to be the one to dig your heels in and say no, MOm, no Dad, I’ve got this.[/tweetthis]
If some of those who are so dedicated to some of the traditions knew how they came about the feelings concerning them might be quite different.
There is no reason to truly follow the leader so to speak when it comes to your wedding. It is your wedding, it is your day and you are starting your family. None of these are things you would want to mimic from someone else’s views, life or beliefs. You start your own traditions.
Take the old tradition of the bride’s parents being responsible for the wedding for example. Where did this come from anyways? I do not think that is right, as a matter of fact it is quite backwards. Why not pay for your own wedding, or split the burdian 50/50. If it were on any ONE person should that not be the groom’s responsibility?
Many moons ago women were actually seen as property. The bride’s family paid the groom’s family a dowry to take the burdian from their hands. Ladies you may want to think on this tradition before you bankrupt your parents with a very unflattering and senseless tradition.
You will love and enjoy your special day a lot more if you split the burdian of the day’s finances with your husband to be.
This will also give you a bit of insight on how the two of you will work together with finances, responsibility and under stress. These are priceless tests that will only help you grow more confident and closer if it is in fact the right move at all. This is one of the first major decisions and teamwork situations of your new life together, and it will tell you a lot about what to expect in the future.
If your parents are falling at the chance to fund your big day then by all means do not take that dream away from them and consider yourself blessed. On the other hand if you know your parents are hurting financially do not put that on them. These are not the days where love is not a factor and families needed started kits to be sustained comfortably.
There is no reason while in these modernized rimes we cannot fund our own wedding just as there is no reason to go crazy with the charges if your parents opt to help you out. If you truly love one another then it won’t matter the dress of the venue…even if that means a few friends and the justice of hte peace at your local courthouse.