Are you able to save a relationship after a drunken one night stand? Well, the truth is, a lot of factors are involved with this answer. The first tip we will give you is that you have to talk to the other person involved. See what it means? And see where you stand. Here is everything that you need to know after a drunken one night stand.
Is a Drunken One Night Stand Forgivable?
All relationships are different. There is a chance that the couple did not intend this to happen. In other scenarios, one of the couples is already in a relationship. Sometimes, a one night stand is forgivable while other times, it’s not. Sometimes, couples don’t realize that an affair has occurred until it’s happening.
What is a One Night Stand?
One night’s stands have several definitions among people. The best way to describe it is nights that occur because of poor judgment. What occurs in a one night stand is a single sexual encounter. And after that, there are to be no further sexual relations in the future time.
One Night Stands = Cheating
Infidelity is complex. Everyone has a different response to their relationship, whether they are healthy or not. Cheating happens when there is a lack of insecurity, avoidance, loneliness, lack of sex, or more arguments than there should be. Through this one night stand, the cheater is attempting to connect with themselves.
Should I Reveal the One Night Stand
That is up to you. The answer is yes. The biggest factor that destroys relationships nowadays is cheating. A lot of variables are at the forefront when one decides to come clean about the affair. Let’s take a look at these questions.
- Option 1: Are you in love with the person with who you had a one night stand?
- Option 2: Are you only doing it for the sex?
- Option 3: Is there something missing in your current relationship?
If your scenario is option 1, then it is time to confess. However, if it is not that, and you still love your current relationship, you should sit down and talk anyway. Believe us, holding onto these kinds of confessions is not good for you. Aside from distrust between the partners, you become self-conscious of your own actions.
Why Should I Reveal a One Night Stand?
Free yourself of the guilt. As we have said throughout this article, living with guilt is not a healthy option. You become distant. And it ruins your current relationship and outlook on yourself.
Should I Reveal if it Was Just One Time?
Again, that is all up to you. If you know that it was just a one time thing and it was by accident, then maybe it doesn’t have to come up. Telling your partner may make things worse. However, you never know if revealing the truth could resolve problems on both ends for the better.
Don’t Lie if they Ask
Oftentimes, your partner will ask if you cheated. It’s okay, they want to know, so they have saved you from one step. In the next step, you have to come clean and tell them. Gaslighting is not the right way to go by saying something along the lines of, “It’s all in your head’.
No, tell the truth. Making the other feel paranoid hurts the relationship. Plus, trust is hurt, too.
Beginning the Confession to Your Partner
Here’s how you begin a confession about a one night stand with your partner. Take a deep breath. This talk is not going to be easy. You need to go in knowing that your partner may not forgive you for what happened. During this talk, the one who has cheated on their partner should focus on themselves. Identify the reason behind this one night stand.
Options to Consider During a One Night Stand
- Is it Ongoing?
Tell them if the one night stands have been ongoing or if it only occurred once. If there is a chance that somebody else could tell your partner, you need to come clean about it. Lying is never an option. It only gets you into further trouble.
- Get Advice
For anyone who needs advice, seeks help. Confiding in friends is not your best option. Friends may turn against you for what happened. Instead, look into therapists or contacting specific telephone counseling. We cannot do this alone. Living with guilt consumes us.
Here’s what you should expect when you go to counseling. All counselors have different views. Some will discuss that not all affairs are due to troubled marriages. According to studies, most men are happy in their relationships. The ultimate reason why they had an affair is based on their attitude and values of monogamy.
- Why Did this One Night Stand Occur?
Think about why it happened. Once you have a clean slate, then it is easier to talk about. Infidelity is often a symptom of affliction in a relationship. Confessing to your partner forces you to address the underlying issues. Or infidelity may not be the problem at all. You were drunk, right? Maybe a drinking problem is the main issue here.
- Take a Look at Studies
Okay, before you do this, just know that everyone across the Internet has varying opinions. Most of these opinions don’t have much to do with anything. Based on studies, infidelity is the #1 cause for most divorces.
Although most people who have affairs believe that their marriage will work out only 3% of 4,100 high-powered, unfaithful, men divorced their wives and married their lovers. But don’t go by that. You should go through with this by your own instincts.
Can the Relationship Survive?
That is the most important question of all. It is possible. Trying to understand why it happened is the most important part that couples should discuss. Avoid trying to figure out how it happened and who was involved. The cheater should recognize their mistakes, think for a day on whether they can salvage their relationship, and then progress together.
Why Forgiveness is Important
Always consider forgiving someone. It’s not healthy to hold onto a grudge. Forgiveness means that you are willing to accept someone’s apology. Don’t overlook the cheating. Start with a clean slate. Couples need to talk about what happened to move forward. It’s the key to the healing process.
How to Rebuild a Relationship After Cheating
Yes, there is going to be arguing among couples when a one night stand is revealed. Once the arguing has passed, it is crucial to understand both sides of the situation. We all make mistakes. Instead of immediately breaking things off on the first decision, realize that humans are flawed. Work together as a couple to find forgiveness.
- Take Responsibility
Outright saying it is the fault of the other that they took part in the one night stand does not look good on your part. Full disclosure allows for transparency and vulnerability. Both couples need to be open about their feelings.
- Be the First to Tell Them
You need to be the first to tell them. Remember that episode of Friends where Ross wasn’t the first to tell Rachel about a one night stand? Don’t let that happen to you. Your partner feels betrayed if you are not the first one to tell them.
- Recognize the Pain
The wounded partner is in a tough place right now. It’s going to take time to forgive the cheater. If the cheater insists that they have done wrong and did not mean to cause pain, the conversation is going in the right direction.
- Make Priorities in the Relationship
The cheater needs to be open to whatever you want them to do to rebuild the relationship. Sometimes, the couple cannot talk it out. And that is okay. Marriage counseling is up to hear your opinions so they can help work the situation out.
- Spare Your Partner from Agony
Your partner is going to feel many mixed emotions that are hard for them to describe. It’s selfish to burden your partner with this information, especially if you have no intention of continuing this behavior. You need to work this out.
- Be Honest
Has this drunken one night stand changed things with you and the other person involved? If you are in love with them, your partner deserves the truth. Contrarily, they’re going to be continually questioning what they did wrong or what they could do to fix the relationship.
Can You Save The Relationship?
Was this drunken one night stand a one time thing? Most of the time, drunk one night stands are forgivable. Or has it been ongoing for some time? That’s what you need to decide. If it has been ongoing then it is time to consider ending your current relationship.
You are the only person that you need, to be honest with yourself in this situation. Make a wise decision. Although it hurts, it’s better to be honest, instead of lying.