Are you wondering if your ex-partner has missed you at all? It’s been weeks since they ended the relationship. Knowing the right psychology behind a relationship is important to be informed about. To the dumper, a breakup takes a slower time to process. Here’s more that you need to know of when the dumper starts to miss the dumpee.
Why is it a Slow Process for the Dumper?
As we mentioned, the dumper is much slower at processes the breakup. Unfortunately, they don’t experience pain and anxiety quickly. Without the awareness of the dumpee, they tend to detach from the relationship without their partner being aware.
Breakups are grueling. They are messy. In no way are they fun. Each side of the relationship experiences raw emotions. It takes time to recover from a breakup on both sides because of the separation anxiety. Sometimes it takes at least a year for each side to mend.
When Does the Dumper Start to Miss the Dumpee?
Not right after the breakup. The dumper is off in their own world chasing after their own dreams. It’s a time where they may miss the memories, but not you. Their plans in life don’t include you.
But read into the signs carefully. The dumper has thought up smart ways to act like they are okay. Get advice. Everyone goes through a contrasting behavior change during a breakup.
Reasons Why The Dumper Misses The Dumpee
Dumpers miss the dumpee for these four reasons:
- Want to Relieve Their Guilt
- Using the Ex for Validation
- Stringing the Ex Along
- (MOSTLY) When an ex wants you back
Does The Dumper Really Miss the Dumpee?
Your ex doesn’t really miss you if they are with someone else. He only misses you for the role that you played in the relationship. This is something to really pay attention to. What your ex loves is his guilt-free pre-breakup time that exhibited a lot more relaxation than the mess he put himself in.
Look at it this way, as long as you are an ex, then they don’t miss you. Normally, a dumper does not want anything to do with the dumpee unless they are happy. The dumper has no remaining romantic feelings anymore because they had lost the will to fight for you. They made a conscious decision to leave you behind.
This is where you need to pay very close attention to what the dumper says, reacts, and what they are doing now.
Will the Dumper Regret Breaking Up With you?
Dumpers come back for themselves, not you. There’s no simple method to tell if the dumper has come back for the right reasons. Asking them specific questions on why they came back directly is going to manifest positive answers you expect to hear from him.
The dumper has changed since the breakup. They are no longer ecstatic to share their life with you. Upon their return, there’s a darkness of solitude in them. In contrast to when you first started dating, he is here solely to help himself, and not you.
If the dumper said they came back to you because they aren’t fond of their new partner or feels incredibly depressed without you, chances are you should reject him.
Should You Let the Dumper Suffer?
Good question indeed. Breakups are the ultimate test. Since your ex’s viewpoint of you didn’t develop when your ex wanted it to—but alternately got worse instead, your ex’s negative energy kept getting bigger and bigger.
Because you have let your ex go uncontrolled, letting themselves engulf on all this negativity, the ex entitled themselves to get occupied by the self-created negativity produced by poor thinking patterns and broke up with you.
The best thing that you can do is to admit it as there’s just too much negativity overlooking you from getting close to your ex to reason with him or her.
Signs that the Dumper Misses the Dumpee
- Dumper is Depressed
When the dumper has you on his mind for days and days, hours and hours, minutes and minutes, they are not happy about what they did. It also means that they are not happy with themselves. They understand the mistake they made and try to get back in contact with you.
- Unsuccessfully Rebounds
If your ex has another unsuccessful relationship, you come into the picture again. Upon an unsuccessful rebound, it makes the dumper realize your worth. It makes him come back and beg to be in a relationship again.
- Single Life is Too Difficult
Upon realizing that they did not want to be single, the dumper starts to miss you. Oftentimes, the dumper starts to remember their ex upon encountering problems that are outside of their control. These problems include health, death in the family, or issues financially.
- Have a Bad Date
Realizing that they don’t want to be single, the dumper will try dating again, It’s not a successful turnout. When the dumper encounters a problem in a new relationship they start to think about you. They miss you. The failed startup to a new relationship is a realization that the dumper made a big mistake ending a relationship that could have easily been talked out.
- The Dumper Has Exhausted All Options
It’s not until the dumper misses the dumpee when they’ve has unsuccessful relationships for months or years. They can’t focus. The dumpee is on their mind because they feel that they had a much easier time with you.
- The Other Dumpee Agrees With You
It’s not a good sign when the second dumpee takes the side of your dumpee. That’s because the dumper has talked on and on about you to them. Your ex needs to be emotionally mature and self-aware – which they were not doing.
- Random Excuses to Contact You
There goes your phone again. If the dumper randomly calls or texts you, that is a sign that they miss you. You are still on their mind if they keep reaching out to you.
- Jokes About Missing You
If you are ever in a scenario where you have to see your ex, like in school, listen to the way they talk to their friends. Does the dumper joke about missing you? Humor is used to soften the impact of truth. If your ex jokes about you, they miss you.
Jealousy is the #1 sign that the ex misses you. They don’t like seeing you with someone else. If the dumper is jealous, that is a sign that they still have feelings for you.
- Is Constantly Nostalgic
If the ex is constantly talking about memories that happened from the past, it means they want to have you back.
What Should I Say When My Ex Misses Me?
Another very good question. Be prepared when an ex admits that they miss you. In the long run, whether it’s months or a year, have a little something planned out on what you will say.
First tip: Do not lose self-control.
Think of how the dumper treated. Think of the way they ended things. Do you really want to go back into a relationship with them know that the same events could repeat? The truth is that your ex doesn’t warrant your return as any kind of empowerment.
It will only suffocate your ex and render them with a boost in their ego. You immediately accepting and agreeing to what they say gives your ex the moral support they need to continue moving on without you and dating other people.
What If The Dumper Says, “I Miss You?’
Instead of saying “I miss you, too”, you should ask the dumper why they miss you? Listen to the dumper’s answer. If they are being honest or they are having doubts about ending things, they will proceed to tell you that something happened to them. Whether it is guilt, it may just be that they ended a relationship with someone else.
The dumper often refuses to give you the real truth. By denying essential information from you, your ex will naturally decline to give you the truth that you ask for. Instead, they show you how much he or she values you.
It’s Not Your Job to Discern the Dumper’
It’s a smarter decision that you don’t provide the empowerment that your ex wants from you. If the dumper wants the dumpee back, take that power and break up with them. Show the dumper that you are in charge. The dumper needs to learn better respect.
You’ll Hear From the Dumper
You will hear from the dumper if they miss you. be very careful when your ex comes out of nowhere and apologizes saying that they miss you.
TIP: Don’t interpret it as – Your ex misses you. No, the ex misses the parts of you that benefit for their own emotional weakness.
What Does the Dumper Apologise For?
- They cheated on you
- Not speaking directly to you
- They spread rumors
- Blame you for the breakup